Friday, November 18, 2011

Frank Conversations

So the weekend is finally here!  I'm going shopping with my mother-in-law, sister-in-law and sister for the essentials.  I'm a little nervous. 

I am going down tonight alone (DH has to work today and tomorrow and I work Sunday).  I am staying with my in-laws and then tomorrow my sister and sister-in-law are going to come over and we are all going to go shopping in the morning.  My plan is to finally talk to my mother-in-law tonight.  I'm really glad that I did the interview project before this trip.

One idea that I was able to formulate as a result of the interview was that our extended family had to grieve our infertility.  We tried to keep them all in the loop as much as possible because DH and I saw where the plan was going from early on; however some information we wanted to keep between ourselves.  For those of you who have experienced infertility you can understand how invasive the process can be and there are things you probably chose never to share with family.  We are also all waiting and each of us dealing with the waiting in a different way.  I have to blog or I go crazy.  DH says little because thats my DH- he's not a talker.  My mother always is trying to DO something or FIX the problem.

So I still plan on talking to my Mother-In-Law tonight about her initial reaction to our adoption news.  I think my approach and some of the hurt has faded with my new perspective.  I don't think she was trying to be hurtful.  Intentional or not my feelings were hurt.  I hope this weekend can help re-establish our relationship back on a more positive note.  I'd like to think we are two very different people but I hate to admit that we both are very opinionated people.  Sometimes though its key to know when/where to share those opinions.

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