So I'd like to think that we are fiscally responsible. We have minimal credit card balances which ebb and flow but primarily stick near the 0 mark. We have student loans up the wazoo- but who doesn't? We pay our car loan weekly and are starting this month paying our mortgage bimonthly (1/2 at a time) to decrease the interest we pay. ALL of DH's salary goes into savings and we dip in as needed.
We saved for a good down payment for our home, which was excellent practice for what we didn't know what was to come. We save for major purchases like the reno in the bathroom or the dishwasher. Nothing has been more challenging then saving for the adoption. To become a parent from adoption requires financial discipline like no other. We have a pot full and ready knowing that hopefully soon it will be depleted possibly all in one day if we have an out of state placement. I will then be on unpaid maternity leave for 3 months.
Infertility followed by the financial stress of saving for adoption (and then paying for an adoption) sounds like a recipe for marital disaster. So far we have weathered the storm with minimal rough waters. I credit DH's even disposition that likely keeps him employed. I wonder at times how other couples survive or don't survive. It makes me sad our society does not support families like mine more. Not because we are saving the children of the world but because adopting a child should not be a greater financial risk then conceiving a child.
The other day my uncle in England posted a picture of his four year old girl they adopted at no expense to them. On top of it my aunt was paid for her maternity leave and although I dont recall the specific length of time she had off it was far greater then my 3 months. Her time off and benefits were the same as had she had conceived her daughter. My uncle was also eligible for time off but since he is self employed from home chose to continue to work to ensure his business continued to thrive. Oh I can only dream....