"If only you knew what it took to adopt a baby" is a direct quote from a woman I had just met. A beautiful family photo was on her dresser and I commented about how gorgeous her grandson was. She shared with me her dtr-in-law had several miscarages and was unable to have a baby. They "were unable to get a baby here (the united states) that was not drug addicted" (this is a common misconception and I highly doubt the truth for them unless they were hoping for a quick adoption) and had adopted a baby from over seas.
I had two reactions to her story:
1) How proud she was of her Grandson as well has her son/dtr-in-law. She also was able to identify how challenging the process was. It was nice to be able to tell her that I DID know what they had to go through and that many parents could not complete the process successfully. Then my pessimistic side took over...
2) Does her dtr-in-law know she shares her infertility history. I hope my mother-in-law does not explain our infertility challenges when she comments on a photo of her grandchild is what I was hoping. Maybe we should let our families know that its not for public sharing (though I think my family realizes this). I think she was trying to explain why her grandson was a different ethnicity then his parents but still... as far as I was concerned until she told me about the miscarriages they had chosen to adopt for reasons not identified.