So unless I get a call in the next five and a half hours I will be older then thirty when I have our first child. I know its silly and arbitrary but its what I've always expected. If I could have had it my way I'd be working on baby #2 at this point.
I had a really nice birthday weekend with DH and friends celebrating the last of my twenties. We went dancing Friday night and had dances with all my favorite dance partners (DH included). Yesterday I went out to breakfast with a good friend. Last night DH took me to a very nice restaurant. When we got home I took a bath, listened to Frank Sinatra, and relaxed.
Tomorrow I will go to work then get my drivers license renewed (and get a new picture!!). DH will make me a nice dinner, and hopefully my blender will come :)
I try to make myself feel better by saying all of these things would be hard to have done if we had a baby but honestly I'd give it all up in a heart beat. When DH asks me what I want for Christmas I've told him I dont want anything because I dont want anything except a baby. If he really insists on getting something- new siding on the house would be sufficient.
First of all- Happy Birthday! I hope your day turns out full of happiness. I understand the feeling of disappointment in having our life planned out and how we want it to go and things just don't go our way! Keep pushing on...your day will come and it is going to be so special!
ReplyDeleteThank you Amber for the birthday wishes and the kind words. There is nothing harder then not being able to do anything, but wait.
ReplyDeleteHappy Late Birthday! I totally understand - my birthday is next Monday. And although I know my coworkers will bring in breakfast, and my husband will take me to a nice dinner, in the back of my mind, I'll still always have the overshadowing thought "I should have a two year old by now." That's another joy of infertility - it's always there, even when you're celebrating. I know I just need to make sure that I am still aware of all the good things in life - like my husband, and knowing there are others going through the same thing and who understand. Thanks for letting others know they're not alone! I hope you had a wonderful day yesterday!
ReplyDeletePeace!